It's a good thing I don't type with my feet...


Or Monkey See, Monkey Don't


Yep. Last night I broke my little toe. See how half of it is pointing to the left? It shouldn't be.

I'd love to say I did it doing something exciting. Like I was on safari in Africa and a herd of wild elephants stampeded towards me, one stomped on my little toe, and the only reason I evaded death was because a baby elephant (seeing how weak and scared I was) protected me. But that didn't happen.

I'd love to say I broke my toe in a fantastical way. Like a ten-foot tall bunny rabbit jumped into my yard demanding the carrots from garden. And I told the bunny they hadn't grown yet, that they they'd only just sprouted. Well, monster bunny got mad, real mad! But before he attacked my little toe with his giant bucked teeth, a flock of birds (seagulls?) carried me out of harm's way. Unfortunately, I was too heavy (having eaten all this glorious French food) and they dropped me. I landed on my little toe, snapping it in half. But that didn't happen either.

I wasn't playing football (soccer) barefoot with the eleven-year-old.

I didn't drop a hammer on it.

No, I just stubbed the thing on one of our big wooden chairs. HARD. So last night the Frog (who wanted to set my toe himself???!!) and I spent some time at the emergency room. To add insult to injury, I overheard this conversation while sitting in my wheel chair:

Jean-Luc (speaking to the attendant): It's without a doubt! My wife has broken one of her toes.

Man (speaking to nobody, and everybody, under his breath, and behind Jean-Luc's back): Oh, let's see. She's blond. She has blue eyes. I wonder how that happened.

Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), Jean-Luc didn't overhear the obnoxious dude's snide remark. And had I not been in a wheel chair with my broken toe, I would (probably not) have kicked the guy. Only THEN would I have a great story to tell.

If only...


* Les orteils and les doigts de pieds (seriously? fingers of the toes?) are both French for toes. I'll go with orteil. Thank you very much.

I'm back to blogging once a week, alternating days. See you next Wednesday the 11th, for a Wednesday is all Write installment. For the rest of the week I'll hobble (not hop) from one blog to another, purple foot and all.

Finally, here's a new song/artist for all you francophiles:



Bisous.

SOUND OFF: Ever broken anything?


 

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